Engagement Party Vendors in San Jose

The engagement party is the event most often overbuilt. People book a wedding sized venue for a party of fifty and then spend the evening in a room that swallows them. In San Jose the better move is almost always a private room inside somewhere that is already good: a restaurant in Japantown, a closed off section along Lincoln Avenue in Willow Glen, a long table at Santana Row. You pay a minimum spend instead of a rental, the food is the restaurant's normal food rather than a catering menu, and nobody has to think about tables, glassware or cleanup. The thing worth real attention is the guest list, because this is usually the first time two families are in a room together and the seating matters more than the flowers.

What to know

Take a private room over a venue.

For fifty people a restaurant room in Japantown, Willow Glen or at Santana Row beats an empty event space every time. You trade a rental fee for a minimum spend and inherit a kitchen, staff and a room that already looks finished.

Introduce the families on purpose.

This is often the first time both sides meet. Give the couple ten minutes at the start to walk one set of parents around the other, or seat the two families together deliberately. Left to chance, the room splits in half and stays that way.

Keep the speeches short and few.

Two toasts, two minutes each, early in the evening while people are still at tables. An engagement party that runs a wedding length program feels like a rehearsal for the real thing and uses up goodwill you will want in a year.

Say something about gifts in the invitation.

Guests will ask. Whether the answer is no gifts, a registry or nothing at all, put it in writing so forty people do not each call a parent to find out. This is the most common question at this particular event.

Ask about the noise and the room next door.

A private room is often separated by a partition rather than a wall. Ask what is booked beside you, whether music is allowed, and how loud your room can get before the restaurant asks you to bring it down.

Common questions

How big should an engagement party be?

Usually smaller than the wedding, often thirty to sixty. Anyone invited here should also be invited to the wedding, so build this list out of that one rather than the other way around.

Who hosts an engagement party?

Traditionally one set of parents, though couples hosting their own is now just as common, and two families splitting it is common too. Decide who is paying before booking, because it sets both the budget and the guest list.

How long should it run?

Three hours is plenty. A late afternoon or early evening window works well, and it lets guests who are driving get home before the roads get difficult. Long engagement parties tend to thin out rather than build.

Do we need a photographer?

Not necessarily, but an hour of coverage at the start captures both families together, which is often the only time that happens before the wedding. Many photographers offer a short block for exactly this.